Home Design for Introverts

A few days ago, I said that I have a new project, reinventing the world with the introverts in the majority.  To kick that off, I thought it would be fun to design a home for introverts.  Granted, all of us have our favorite home decor types, so the details will differ, but can we pretend what the perfect home would be for you?  This is just a fun daydreaming kind of exercise, so don’t get too intense over it.  (Who am I kidding???? I’m talking with people who live in their heads.  Intense is a given!)

First thing in a perfect Introvert world would be peaceful seclusion.  This might be a little bit of overkill, but you get the idea:


I don’t think I’d ever find the front door on this one, but it sure is interesting:

labyrinth House

This is my fantasy house.  It’s actually north of where I live, somewhere in Portland, Oregon, USA.  The Wilkerson Residence is gorgeous.  No, I haven’t seen it in person, just on television, but I could certainly enjoy living there.  The link takes you to the architect’s site and more pictures of the house, if you want to see what it’s like living in the trees.


But for those of us who don’t own an island on a lake, or can drop a house down in the middle of a verdant maze, or build a huge tree house, what else can we mere mortals do?

Maybe a cozy house in a small town?  In a quiet neighborhood?  If you prefer big cities, I’d bet you would still try to find an apartment in a quiet building, perhaps with a balcony where you can sit quietly and watch the world go by.  We introverts are great observers, after all.

We’d need a private space where we can retreat.  Maybe a meditation room, or a special nook  where we can curl up with a good book.  Or a huge, stately library like in Downtown Abbey where you treat yourself to the feel and smell of fine books?  it would have a little writing desk where you could record your thoughts.meditation room

I’d like a meditation room with filtered sunlight, preferably filtered by green trees right outside my window.  I’d want access to a sheltered outdoor zen garden for when the weather is nice.  My indoor space would have a gently murmuring waterfall and some fire element, too.  I like the new gel fireplaces you can put indoors without having to vent them.  Just something small to put on a table top.  Staring into a flame is mesmerizing and relaxing.


I love to walk and think at the same time, so I would love an outdoor labyrinth to walk.  Mine would have a nice bench in the center so that I could sit and reflect before winding my way back out again.


What would be in your fantasy home? 

How would you structure it to keep the world at bay so that you can get the peace and quiet you need to recharge?  A wonderful spa tub?  Steam room?  Gourmet kitchen (with or without a personal cook)? 

How would you design your personal space if money and relationships didn’t get in the way? 

Or have you already done that?  Share with us!

Hi.  I’m Chris.  I’m an introvert.  Look for my ongoing series debunking the introvert myths (Sunday) and introvert cartoons (Wednesday), plus anything else interesting that I find in the meantime.  Come and share with like-minded introverts.  I also contribute to the new food blog Three’s Cooking, learning to cook from the heart, for the soul.

28 thoughts on “Home Design for Introverts

  1. That’s a great post. You’ve got me to a tee there. Seclusion if possible but then if not a place I can collect my thoughts. Near to somewhere where I can get some quiet time (beach or woods). I’ve often dreamt of having a place in the countryside. An old farm house with some land that I can spend my days growing crops and tending to flowers. Perfect 🙂

  2. Brilliant blog.
    I wonder if an introvert would blog; it does require something from you and a blog is by definition intrusive.
    Giving it some thought, my world could be served to perfection living in an apartment with a roof garden on the top of a tall building; everything could be delivered, one way or another.

    • Introverts love to blog, I’m finding out, but even that amount of controlled social interaction can be draining. Who would have thought?
      Ah, you’re a city person. I’m a country girl, but I can see that would be a good option if you enjoyed city life. It’s at your doorstep, if you want it, but otherwise you can just anonymously observe. Wonderful.

  3. I think that I’d start with one of those houses that’s built into a hill. I wouldn’t want a house in the middle of a lake, for example – it could be viewed by all-comers from all sides!
    There would be light pipes and windows at the front, and it would be nice and warm as three sides would be inside the hill (but with a hidden emergency escape for a back door). Just got to work out how to get the internet.

    Sorry, you said not to get too intense and here I am on the verge of drawing up the plans 🙂

  4. I’m an extrovert with introvert tendencies (does that even make sense?). I would love to live in seclusion some days. As long as I could get back to the action with a 10 minute drive. 🙂

    • Sure that makes sense, Sue. It’s a continuum, and we can slide along it. I can understand what you’re saying. We choose to live in a small town that is within driving distance of a big city. It’s always there if we need it.

  5. I can make do in any environment, I think, as long as I have a nice room to read in. Comfortable chair, perfect lighting, no TV allowed. I guess that would be a library or study, but I would want it to not be as stodgy as those sound 🙂

  6. Oh lordy. When I was about 10, we lived in a house that had a very tiny bathroom (toilet plus 1 cupboard) with a door into the den AND a door to the stoop at the back door. I used to sit on the “john” and imagine that was my living space, and how I would decorate it. I should have known then I was a “party of one” (even though I happily live with my introvert Hub).

    • Too funny! You are a true blue introvert, Sammy.

      I should take a poll on whether introverts do better with other introverts or if they need a little spice in their lives and get it from an extrovert partner.

      • The timing of your remark is uncanny. I’ve been meaning to ask you to write about who introverts choose for platonic friends (I don’t want to write about this on my post because of an ongoing relationship). It seems like we choose none, another introvert or an extrovert. My pattern (repeated three times in 10 year cycles) has been to choose an extrovert (what I call a performance artist), and then meld myself to fit her needs (be her audience) so I benefit from her star shine and her social circle. They are fun-filled, exciting friendships. But eventually, I either get sick of the ways I’m compromising myself (I hate having to host reciprocal dinner parties, etc.) or I begin to resent her because she can’t/won’t give me what I need (which is not her fault; I should know by now!) Then we “break up”. And yet, there is part of me that craves the stimulation the performance artist provides (especially since Hub is an introvert). I know I’m the only one who can break my pattern. But, still, if you’ve got thoughts, please write a post and solicit feedback. If only to assure me I’m not alone in my struggle!

        What’s your going rate for consulting fees, anyway ?!?

        • Your wish is my command. Watch for tomorrow’s myth busting blog, Introverts don’t like people.

          Consulting fees? Drop me a line via my contact page. I’d love a conversation with you.

  7. Think I would appreciate a traditional Japanese farm house. I am keen upon rather spartan living quarters based on aesthetics. My wife, would like more amenities, fluff. I may appreciate her bits of fluff, but only if it still allows for accessibility. As we age, we’ll need that.

  8. That labyrinth house looks appealing, very appealing. My dream house would be somewhere in the woods by a lake, not necessarily the wilderness, but most definitely secluded.
    Sometimes, I am scared just how much I DON’T crave socialization.

  9. Great post! I have always been an introvert, but found it no longer worked for me, so now I am more outgoing. I am getting ready to move to the city and experience noise and neighbors after 15 years living in the woods. I look forward to finding a place that can accommodate my more introverted moments. I do still need a little corner to retreat to, and spend many hours alone in my head. I plan to set up a little Buddhist shrine in a quiet but sunny spot. Maybe even out on a little patio that gets good sun most of the day, especially the morning. And a place to do my yoga or Tai Chi.

  10. I love the house in the labyrinth! I want a fenced property with a gate that I can keep locked when I don’t want anyone to come to the door….which would be always. I really hate being disturbed at home. Conveniently spotty cell service would be a plus too. 🙂

  11. Your fantasy house sounds wonderful. I’d also want a fruit and vegetable garden so I could go out and pick fresh foods before each meal. . . and maybe a couple chickens. . . and while I’m at it, it might be nice to have a cow to graze in the pasture. . .

  12. Pingback: Saturday Stuff | 61 Musings

  13. On Saturdays, I don’t even leave the condo if I can help it. Today I had to in order to drop a Netflix envelope in the mail. Bleah!

    My fantasy house would be divided into themes. My condo kind of is already, but not to the extent that I want. My guest bathroom is “Unfortunate Hotels.” I want my master bathroom to have a sealife theme, but no progress there yet. The master bedroom: Critter Country. The den: Adventureland. General living area: Haunted Mansion / weird odds and ends.

    Yes, I have an interest in Disney. Why do you ask?

  14. I would love to have a little house on the outskirts of the city. Enough rooms for all my different activities and family, but not gigantic. I want interesting things, artwork, sculptures everywhere. I like unique design aspects, like having a glass floor with water underneath and lighting, for serene meditation and relaxation.

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